By Yusuff Aminat Oyindamola.

Sister Habeebah is in full-on Ramadhan mode. She’s braving the thirsty afternoons with tawakkul, the promise of a greater reward beyond her transient thirst. She’s standing in prayer in the midnights, immersing herself in her supplications to Allah. Her tongue is moistened with the remembrance of Allah, as if her goal is to make sure her heart grows closer to Allah during this holy month, no matter what He takes. Talk about Ibaadat being on point.

But alas. Humans are not made perfect. Not in any way. But where Sister Habeebah’s faults lay was a special place.

There’s a particular sense of brotherhood our generation seems to lack in comparison with the early Muslims. Gone are the days when the food of two was enough for three, and friends offered to share their provisions, albeit meagre, whenever their friends needed it. Then, the honour of a fellow Muslim was paramount, and anything that threatened the dignity of a brother was seen as an enemy. But what do we have today?

Sister Habeebah who wears the full hijab, but doesn’t like to initiate the tasleem with the sisters that do not. Even when they do, she finds it hard to answer, because she thinks that they are not worshipping Allah properly. She chants her adhkar at their appointed times without fail, but speaks to her younger ones in a way that makes them shake. The Qur’an is her companion, and she gives Sadaqah as she’d even give out her right hand if needed, but she finds it hard to be the one to apologize, even when she’s clearly wrong. She doesn’t owe anybody anything, in her mind.

And maybe that’s the issue. Thinking that we don’t owe anybody anything. Not kindness, not patience, not even an apology when we’re wrong. I’ve seen it on the Internet a few times. Sentences like “your life is yours only, because you don’t owe anyone anything.” I keep repeating it, because the concept feels strange to me. Because we owe a lot of people a lot of things. And even the religion teaches us that our companions, our brothers in the fold of Islam have rights upon us.

“And speak to people good words.” (Qur’an 2:83)

Which means that we do owe them something.

When we go out, and we smile at someone we meet on the road, and offer the tasleem to them, we don’t know if they have been having a bad day, and our small gesture is enough to make it better. When we see a sister struggling with the hijab, and we treat them with love, and make them feel not like a sinner, but gently guide them toward the proper path with our soft words, we don’t know if we’ll make a difference. When we’re walking, and we lift a tree branch away from the road, we don’t know if we just saved a person from falling. And when we make amends with our relationships that have gone sour, we don’t know if Allah will consider that single act, and forgive our sins. We really don’t know a lot of things. Which is why we should be kind.
Some of the things I just mentioned have been described by the Prophet ﷺ as Sadaqah, which should serve to inform us of how important they are.

The Prophet ﷺ said: “Your smile for your brother is a charity (ṣadaqah).” (Tirmidhi)

The religion is so perfect, that even these small things are enough to get rewards from Allah, while also keeping our ties of kinship strong. And yet, we ignore this two-way win, just because we think we don’t owe anybody anything?

And yes. Some wounds run too deep for a few words to magically make it better. There are people who it’s hard to treat with kindness, because they themselves have pushed us away with their actions. Not every relationship can be repaired, but it’s not about perfection. It’s about trying. To bridge the gap. Remembering that it’s an act of worship, and that everyone is trying their best to the limits of their abilities. Being the first person to step forward isn’t a sign of weakness. It communicates strength, a willingness to rise above one’s ego, and make amends.

The Prophet ﷺ said: “Whoever reconciles two people, Allah will reward him as if he had freed a slave from the children of Isma’il.” (Musnad Ahmad)

And one other right that can’t be overemphasized is debts. Allah has stressed that we shouldn’t fault our debts, and the Prophet ﷺ said it many times to try as much as possible to not die without settling our debts, and even when we do, encourages our kin to pay it off on our behalf. So, as Muslims, why should we borrow money with the intention of not repaying it? Even when we don’t have the capability to do so, it is something we should strive for as we strive to move closer to Allah. For your brother who lent you money free of interest does so out of love for you, and it is an Amaanah upon you to return it duly.

“O you who have believed, when you contract a debt for a fixed term, write it down… And fear Allah. And do not diminish anything from it…” (Qur’an 2:282)

And

The Prophet ﷺ said:
“The soul of a believer is held hostage by his debt until it is paid off.” (Tirmidhi, Abu Dawood)

Ramadhan is approaching again. We’re preparing our bodies for the thirst that’s coming, and already setting goals for how many times we want to complete the Qur’an. But beyond these, preparing for Ramadan is also making amends. Making sure we have not wronged anybody. Ensuring that we treat people with kindness. Settling our debts. Softening our hearts towards our companions. Because these acts make us lighter, and what’s a better way to enter the holy month than with a heart unburdened by the weight of injustice?

Allah has placed us into this world, not as beings that can live alone, but in groups. Our Prophet and his companions have shown us what it means to have true brotherhood and show compassion. Our religion has emphasized that our brothers have rights upon us. So, who are we to deprive them of their rights? Ramadan is a month for togetherness. This is obvious in the joy of observing iftar in groups, of praying Tarāwih in congregation, and of Eid being an opportunity to celebrate with our loved ones. So, as we prepare to welcome the holy month with both hands, are we also amending our relationships, and giving our brothers their rights?

Our Lord, make us among those who establish ties of kinship, forgive us, and guide us to do what is pleasing to You. Aameen.